WALKING ON THIN ICE

our landing

beach, adriatic, boat, blue.

tooth mounds

left from the old giant family.

egg rocks

i’m not staying around long enough for them to hatch. the sound on the beach: crick crack crack as the water gonks in and stones slide due to variations of temperature. rice crispy rocks.

ascent

onto cauliflower land. the cauliflowers are less than a hundred feet from the sea. they protrude from the red red dirt. the leaves are gigantic. this is the first line of cruciferous defense. the cabbages lie in the next line of fields inland.

the giant house

the giant family

they are frozen in their house.
 

we crept out through cabbage beach, careful  not to make a sound.
 

the daughter waits inside the ruin.

How did the Universe get here? That’s a good question. Actually, the Universe was a lost possibility. A potentiality that was wandering between what mighta been and mightnotta been. It just sort of simmered, that way, in nothingness before it became somethingness. Now where this potentiality of possibility was or came from before it got lost is something I’m still working on. I think it’s the same place that quarks go when they aren’t here anymore. But while lost, and simmering in this endless nonmeasure of notime, the tension between what might be and what almost was increased, exponentially. And at some point in its nonpoint linearity, it exploded. And nothingness became somethingness. And this somethingness was incoherent, confused.

Different eddies moving different speeds and directions and vectors developed tendencies towards personalities. Some might call them gods. But they’re just aspects of confused randomness. And after a while tensions and stresses and frictions developed between these tendency currents. And a war broke out in Heaven. The Lucifer tendency got pissed because the God tendency had trendier tenets, which ticked off the God tendency and the resulting explosion when Lucifer was hurled from the heavens resulted in what we know, what we call the Big Bang.

It’s not that the God tendency was right. It’s just that it had more flow. And you can’t buck flow. It’s been downhill ever since.

I do have an idea of where these tendencies come from in the first place, this lost possibility. It actually comes through leaky vents from alternative universes. The trouble with this is of course that alternative universes also have to have their origins. What I suspect is just a round robin. They all feed on and off of each other. They get out of order and leak bits over here, create us. We leak stuff and create others. Ad infinitum. Like an endless game of cosmic musical chairs, only with no empty chairs. And even if we could go back and explain how the very first one started, that would still leave the music unexplained, which drives the whole thing.

There is no best or worse universe. There’s only logic and flow, and chance. You should go with the flow. Things go better than if you go against the flow. Unfortunately, 99.999% of humanity doesn’t even know flow exists. They try to impose their will on flow, rather than go with flow or collaborate with flow or play with flow. So the world we’ve created is truly fucked up. It’s anti-logic. It’s anti-flow.

And there is no best or worst of worlds. There are just best or worst of ways to handle what is. And again, what is has tendencies. And is is all things at once. It’s what you expect to see or ask to see that collapses all is into specific is. And if you keep collapsing is into negative shit, which most people do, you’re going to end up with this humungous pissed-off negative universe which gets off by stomping you. But if you expect a playful universe that has a wry sense of humor, that’s what you experience.

So once again it’s the quest of good against evil. If we can get enough good folk playing with a happy playful flow, we’ll have a happy universe. But right now, it’s like the bad guys are winning. Too much Barry Manilow. Not enough Meat Beat Manifesto.

The way the scientists figure it, the universe is composed of 5% normal matter. This 5% is everything we can see and measure. That means 95% of the universe we have no idea what’s going on. They break that 95% down into 25% dark matter and 70% dark energy. I’d say that’s pretty accurate. We seem to have about 5% good folk and 95% weak, bad folk on this earth. But the good news is 5% of focused light can vanquish 95% of confused darkness. So it’s up to us 5% to save the universe from darkness.

Plus this makes a difference, because we’re leaking out our edges and creating other universes. And if we leak light, we’ll give the other universe a whole better chance of survival. And if we keep leaking dark, there’s just going to be more of the same old going on.

- Kathy Ireland Smith & Steven B. Smith - December 26, 2006

we stole a cauliflower from a field by the sea.  we cooked it.  we ate it.  it was the most delicious cauliflower we’ve ever tasted.  in our defence, it was from a field which had already been harvested, and it was a puny misshapened one on the edge by the road.  we didn’t steal to steal - we took it out of curiosity, to commune with the fruit of the croatian soil in a spiritual earthy way.

kathy says the only thing she ever stole was a quarter from her parent’s table… she felt bad and confessed to her folks.  i, on the other hand, have an outlaw past.  but that’s not my now… somehow, somewhere i discovered morality along the way and became infected with it.

finished my 2nd collage since leaving the states - a word collage.  my first 3 pieces of art (as a midshipman in the u.s. naval academy at annapolis in 1965) were word collages… my first wall hanging piece of art i did in baltimore in 1968 was also (see voodoo lounge at www.agentofchaos.com/voodoolounge_jpg.html - i still have it).  i’ve been wanting to do some more word collages for the past 20 years.  now will do more word ones.

It doesn’t pay to beat a dead hearse… the deeper the cleavage, the slipperier the slope.

traded my old kathy in on new chopped & channeled kathy.  left america 5 months ago with long-haired kathy.  she cut half off in london in a pageboy bob.  yesterday she chopped it down to a french do.  from long-haired girly girl to matronly pageboy to french punkette - travel sure changes one.

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts.  Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things can not be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.”  Mark Twain, The Innocents Abroad - Or, The New Pilgrims’ Progress (1869).

i’ve traveled an odd and variegated journey since starting in the panhandle of idaho in 1946… more or less in order, i’ve lived worked studied or stayed in washington state, oregon, california, tennessee, maryland, hawaii, florida, virginia, connecticut, new york, washington d.c., pennsylvania, texas, georgia, wisconsin, michigan, arizona, ohio, west virginia, nevada, canada, luxumberg, belgium, netherlands, england, poland and now croatia at the end of 2006. i’ve hitchhiked across the northern u.s., thru its middle, and along its bottom as well. met a great number of good people.  trouble is, everywhere i went, i found me there judging me.

“We make out of the quarrel with others, rhetoric; but of the quarrel with ourselves, poetry” - William Butler Yeats

last day of 2006. 16 months now for kathy and i. before her, mine was a singular journey - no matter whom i was with.  now i’m two, and we’re two as one.  even when alone i’m not alone.

no resolutions this new year’s eve except my eternal try at being a better person, producing more, becoming more compassionate and patient, more helpful and gentler to others - and of course finding marijuana… “For me wanna marijuana / And me wanna do the dog / Bow the wow to shady lady / Leap and lap her fire log / Oh let me be your poodle boy” (2nd verse from Lamentation 5 - the Faithful Bewail).

scientists are trying to force grow fish twice as fast. say it’ll save the world’s food population. evidently they never watched the roger corman film “humanoids from the deep“. scientists there said the same thing, and the big, fast fish came out upon the land and ate and raped the humans.  it did solve the fish’s food problem, so it wasn’t a total waste.

to satisfy one’s required 2500 daily calorie intake, you could eat 2 cheeseburgers, or 15 pounds of fresh strawberries.

assorted oddities from various newspapers:
1 - A cockroach can live 9 days without its head. 
2 - Beetles taste like apples, wasps like pine nuts, white worms like pork rinds. 
3 - People are basically dark meat.
4 - A blue whale’s tongue weighs 6,500 pounds.
5 - 70% of house dust consists of dead skin flakes.
6 - A four year olds brain is twice as active as an adult’s.
7 - Vegetarians live 10 years longer.
8 - People who attend church more than twice a week live 7 years longer.
9 - Women live 7 years longer than men.
10 - Whites live 7 years longer than blacks.

the oil & chemical industries introduced 70,000 synthetic chemicals into the environment from 1900-2000.

humans have damned up so much water that geophysicists say it has perceptibly altered the way the planet rotates.

what a long road to whore.  we’ve become the curse of our mummy’s womb.  we can take nothing for granted, not even granite.  night has fallen, and it can’t get up.  we’re catching up to the future and we’re filling up the past. we got those old algorithm blues.  jesus as carpenter was a wood worker - jesus as christ a would worker. 

Learn and live.  Know need to no, for the eyes will never be full.