Walking on Thin Ice

i am a marital artist - i know Cunt Fu. i’m going to offer my Cunt Fu classes to the sexually dyslectic. i’ll teach the different stances and motions such as Major Mambo Moving, Lower Lip Loving, Clitoris Centralis Climactus, Helpful Hand Humping, Rapid Rat Rubbing, Elongus Erectus Ejectus, Moist Member Mounting, Fine Finger Furrowing, and that most powerful strategy of all - Tender Tongue Touching.

i also offer extensive courses in Rat Rubbing. have you ever sidled up to your lady and said hey baby i wanna rub your rat. i’m a rat rubber from way back. you want a happy rat, you gotta rub em right. rub em wrong, you might pull back a stump. i like to rub them against my head, generate static electricity, then stick em on the wall - kinda cool to see all these wall rats wiggling their little wet rat lips at you. so sign up now for my course on rudimentary rapidly rotating righteously revolving renditious rat rubbing - reduced rates redacted.