AD.

cookieladycookie Lady

Conversation with Wife 30

Who knew I had 30 wives.
“You’re not the man from St. Ives are you?”

Thought you were going to write.
“Yeah, I’m going to.”
Good, I’ll sit over her and wrong, then.

“Fold me once, fold me twice,
I won’t be fold again.”

“I’m going to lay down, I don’t feel well.”
Good, sleep’s the best thing for being sick.
“What about ice cream,
is ice cream good for being sick?”
Sure, ice cream puts you in a better mood
which increases your positive energy
which strengthens your immuninites.
“Immuninites? My ancestors were Mennonites.”
More likely Mennonites and Womennonites.
“You’re not Mormon, are you?”
No, I’m less man, more mutant.

What you working on?
“I’m Photoshopping out the background
of a picture of a battery. I need the energy.”
Batteries in some cell phones have been exploding.
“Are they re-volting?”
No, reading crime fiction, took up assault & battery.

She sighs.
What sigh are you?
“What sigh am I on?”
Yes, are you in-sigh or out-sigh?

Leaky Sneaky they used to call me
until I started pissing in their corners
when they weren’t looking
now they call me Sneaky Leaky.
“Where’d I ever find you?”
In the bargain bin
underneath the Blue Light Special
I’m next year’s model of last century’s design.
“Well I’m an earlier version of myself,
about a year and a half ago.”

As she bends over tying her running shoes
I beat on her back with my hands.
“What are you doing?”
Playing my solo.
“Your Hans Solo?”

I’d rather pleasure pleather.
“What about Naugahyde,
how many Naugas does it take to make a hide?”
If I become a proselytizer, will you be my pimp?

All hail dyslexia – tuck Frump.
“I can’t believe this reality we’re in.”
You mean the Presidential election?
“Yes. It’s crazy.”
I think someone left the wrong gate open.

“Dad says drones aren’t evil but sometimes
they’re just flown that way.”
I want to be a good drone when I’m flown up.

“A good reign is a dam long applause.”

Thank you thank you thank you you’re too kind.

 – Smith, 12.1.2016

areyousureaboutthis
Really?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *