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...and they lived happily ever after. Smith & Lady: poets, artists & urban adventurers.
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Archive for the ‘Food’ Category

HIMALAYAN LENTIL CURRY

Thursday, December 31st, 2009

Yuyu taught me how to make Himalayan Lentil Curry. I’ve made several batches since he’s left, and here’s my current rendition of it:

1 bag lentils, soaked overnight
6-8 onions, diced
1 head garlic, diced
2 ” ginger, minced
6-12 chopped tomatoes or mebbe a 15-oz can chopped tomatoes - about 6 cups of tomatoes, I’m guessing
1-2 T turmeric
2-4 T chani dal masala (this is a very hot spice mix)
2 T garam masala *
2 T mustard seeds *
2 T cumin seeds *
3 T coriander seeds
1 t cardamom seeds *
8 cloves *
2 chilies, chopped, with seeds *
1-3 C vegetable oil
1-2 sticks butter
1 can coconut milk
1-2 limes, juice of *
1/2 C goat cheese *

* Items marked with asterisk are not necessary

Roast cumin & mustard seeds in pan 1-2 minutes, until they start to turn aromatic. Roast coriander separately. Grind coriander (can smash with hammer in plastic baggie, or coffee grinder). Or you can use the coriander whole, but ground seems better for texture, especially if there is a lot of it.

The timing seems to work if I chop and cook at the same time. By the time I’m done chopping one ingredient, the mixture is ready for me to incorporate it in.

Chop up the onions. Then start heating 1-3 C oil in big heavy-bottomed pot on medium. While oil is heating, start chopping the garlic. Put seeds in oil for a few minutes. Then add onion and garlic to the oil. Add a little bit of salt (1/2 t?) Fry until onion fairly translucent and aromatic, then set to real low flame.You can spend this time dicing the ginger. Then add ginger, chiles, turmeric, chani dal masala and garam masala. Stir. Put on low heat. Start chopping tomatoes. When halfway through chopping tomatoes, add what you’ve chopped to the oil, set the flame a little higher to like a medium flame, then chop the rest, and then add the rest. Cook down about two minutes, then add lentils and cloves and enough water to cover mixture. Mix well. Bring to a boil, then let simmer on low for about an hour to an hour and a half, covered, stirring every ten minutes or so.

Near the end, add the coconut milk, lime juice, goat cheese and butter, mix in until melted and well incorporated. Smash cardamom seeds and sprinkle on. Add salt to taste. You could set it to simmer for a while until it seems ‘right’.

The end result should be a very fatty, delicious, aromatic, tomato-y stew, somewhat reminiscent of sloppy joe flavor - more dense liquid than lentil.

Serving sizes are very small, about 1/3 C. It’s a very rich food, full of delicious fat. I eat it with pita or rice. I figure there are about 25 servings per pot, at about 50 cents/serving. It’s full of antioxidants and fiber and satisfies your hunger for a good 6 hours.

Lady K

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FOOD OF THE GODS

Friday, November 27th, 2009

Somewhere in the middle of yesterday I stepped in dog poo in my parents’ yard, a real big patty that got both shoes. It was like, a veritable cow patty pile of poo. I was so afraid Yuyu would see them and get grossed out. I’d heard about people from India having a kind of real distaste for anything to do with shoes because of dirt, and especially people of his heritage (Brahmans). I set the shoes aside to clean discretely before we left, and promptly forgot about them.

In the hustle bustle of activity before dinner, my grandmother prepared a pumpkin cream cheese dish to schmear on graham crackers. My aunt was to bring pumpkin pie. As my grandmother stirred the schmear, she became fearful of having crossed some sphere of territory of my aunt’s, that the schmear was too dessert-like and also in competition with the flavor of the pumpkin pie.

Yuyu and I had made kheer for dessert as well. Kheer is called ‘the food of the gods.’ It is holy because it has so much cow milk; cows represent Mother Earth. Kheer takes a labor of love to prepare. It’s like a pudding made of rice, milk, nuts and raisins. I stirred the kheer constantly for an hour as it simmered.

So, I was fearful that I’d set my aunt’s dish up for competition, it having been discussed that there are spheres of territory at this Thanksgiving dinner. But everyone took it in stride, a heap of kheer side by side with pumpkin pie.

As my mom chomped away on some bite of dessert, she bit down onto a hard object. ‘Oh!’ she exclaimed, and pulled something out of her mouth. A penny!

“I don’t know where it came from, the pudding or the pie,” Mom said.

“Well, it couldn’t have been our pudding,” I said.

“It couldn’t have been my pie,” said my aunt.

My mom put the penny in her mouth again. “Pie crust,” she said.

“No, it couldn’t have been the pie,” asserted my aunt.

“You are lucky,” Yuyu said. “Copper is very lucky in my country. You are going to be rich.”

“Penny from Heaven,” I said.

After dessert, we had to leave. I realized then I’d forgotten about the shoes. There was no way to deal with them gracefully other than to borrow my Mom’s shoes and put mine in a plastic bag to ‘isolate’ the contamination. I tucked the bag into a corner of my car trunk.

We drove to the end of my parents’ street. Smith and Yuyu said at once, ‘I smell dog shit.’ So I had to tell them about the bag in the trunk. But the smell was really strong, so it was decided that everyone would get out of the car and check their shoes. Yuyu was fine. The shoes I borrowed from my Mom were fine. But now Smith had stepped in shit. I wonder if it was the same pile.

“I wish I had stepped in the shit,” Yuyu said. “In India, it is considered lucky. It means you are going to get rich.”

Lady

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THAI/INDIAN HYBRID CHICKEN CURRY

Monday, November 23rd, 2009

Yesterday we had a party. It was an opportune time as we have Yuyutsu here and we’ve finally straightened our place. I decided to make a chicken curry because I wanted Yuyu to try it. When we were in London I fell in love with chicken curry, and started to learn how to make it. The following ‘recipe’ is based on my experience with making chicken curry about 50 times. The recipe has kind of evolved over time with trial and error.

Yuyu made a wonderful lentil dal–a himalayan curry–and I’m going to try to pin down his ingredients and blog it as well. It was so fun. Yuyu and I were cooking side by side in the kitchen, my shoebox of asian spices open on the counter.

CHICKEN CURRY - THAI/INDIAN HYBRID

2 T mustard seeds
1 T cumin seeds
1 T coriander seeds
1/4 C olive oil
1 T butter
4 medium onions, chopped into 1″ cubes
1/2 bulb garlic, peeled, diced

Heat olive oil in large heavy-bottomed pan. Olive oil isn’t technically ‘asian’ but I think it works well. Add mustard, cumin and coriander seeds and butter. Monitor the seeds and flame to make sure they don’t burn. When the mustard seeds start to pop in the oil (maybe a minute or two after being added), add the onion and garlic. Cook until the onion starts to turn translucent. Stir frequently so the garlic doesn’t burn.

Meanwhile, put these ingredients in a blender:

1/4 to 1/2 C masman curry paste - IMPORTANT *
1″ piece of fresh ginger, peeled and chopped roughly
2 large chilies, with seeds — or more if you can tolerate it!
4 large tomatoes, chopped roughly into wedges
1/2 to 1 C roasted cashews
2 to 3 T good pungent curry powder
more garlic if desired (good for health!)

Pulse and puree the paste, ginger, chilies, cashews, tomatoes and curry powder. You might find it necessary to add a little bit of water to make the ingredients more ‘blendable’ by the blender. You could add more chilies if you can tolerate hot curries. The chilies have a kind of synergy with the ginger and spices and really bring out the flavor, kind of like an Indian ‘menthol’ effect.

Add the fried onion mixture to the tomato mixture in the blender and pulse until fairly paste-like. Don’t worry if it is a bit lumpy or if the seeds haven’t broken down. They will break down more when the paste is cooked. Pour the paste back into the heavy pan. Add another quarter cup olive oil and mix together. Cook on a low flame for about a half hour, scraping the bottom of the pan occasionally. You might find it necessary to add more water if the mixture gets too dry. The mixture should be kind of like a lumpy gravy consistency, pulpy. You want it too cook down a little, so don’t cover the pan. It will make a mess, occasionally plopping bits of orange goo onto your stovetop and walls. This is normal.

After cooking for about a half hour, you can add a half stick of butter (if desired) and a can of coconut milk. Blend in until the butter is melted. It’s not necessary, but the butter is a nice kind of fat to add, good comforting taste. And really enhances the flavor of the spices and I highly recommend it. I don’t skimp on fat in this recipe. Fat is VERY important for flavor and satiety. Many Indian recipes call for ghee (clarified butter) but I find it’s not necessary.

Sample the mixture to see if it is salty enough. The masman curry paste has a lot of salt, so it should be sufficient, but you could add more to make the ingredients ‘zing.’ Sometimes a little sugar brings out more flavor, although I didn’t use sugar last time.

At this point you have a good gravy base for a curry. You could do variations on this using chicken or beef or lamb or just vegetables if you are vegetarian. I think it’s best with chicken and potatoes or chicken and yams or chicken and carrots. I add about 2 pounds of chicken diced into 1″ cubes - a mixture of thigh and breast meat is great.

Last time I made this I used chicken and potatoes. Two pounds of chicken, and about 3 C potatos chopped into 1″ pieces. I added the chicken and potatoes to the gravy in the pot and cooked for about 45 minutes to an hour on a low flame, scraping the bottom of the pan occasionally. I did not lid the pan because the gravy tends to break down more and become more liquidy, and you want a kind of thick gravy at the end, so I let the steam escape. Keep a glass of water nearby to add to the mixture in case it cooks down too much. I kept cooking it until the potatoes were tender and the gravy was cooked down to a nice thickness.

You could dice a half cup of fresh cilantro and add it to the gravy at the end if you like.

Serve with fresh roti or warm pita bread or basmati rice.

- - -

* Masman curry paste - you can find this at an asian grocer. You could try to make it from scratch, but it requires a lot of ingredients, and it’s best if you grind them fresh. The curry paste includes things like chile, ginger, lime peel, etc. You could try a different curry paste here if you like, but the masman is my favorite.

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rhymed reason

Sunday, September 20th, 2009

bumblebee wings - foto by Smith

Here’s another easy poem that goes over well at poetry readings.

Confessions of a Conservative

Let others munch spare frogs legs and things
or their mother’s tidbits so fine.

Not me.
I prefer wee bumblebee wings
with a pipe of blueberry wine.

I’ve no desire for porcupine stew
aunts coated in chocolate yea thick
fried crocodile
ala flayed caribou
or some other chef’s table trick.

A simple table whenever I dine.
Not mine all these modern cuisines.
I’m quite satisfied with blueberry wine
and old fashioned bumblebee wings.


sidewalk shadows - foto by Smith
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cassandra / coffee

Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008

Cassandra - sculpture & foto by smith

Lady found a list of the Ten Best Foods: berries - broccoli - citrus - garlic - nuts - oats - salmon - spinach - tomatoes - turkey.

I can’t find a single correlation between Lady’s list and my list of the 5 basic food groups: cookies - ice cream - pizza - black coffee - chocolate. Alcohol used to be one of my top ten - actually #1 - but I had to give that up almost 18 years ago.

I’ve been thinking about trying a more international diet by adding the Chinese food poison melamine to all my foods. Why should I let foreign fascists poison my food supply when I can do it myself and cut out the middle man?

Here’s a food excerpt from my 3rd Smokey Grey story - Okey Dokey Smokey Grey:

~ ~ ~

Sitting in yet another coffee shop - Radish seemed as enamored of coffee as he was of weed - Smokey watched as Lady K got up and came over to his table, sat down, said “That’s your third cookie this morning. You have quite the sweet tooth. Why do you eat so many sweets?”

“They’re ready made food units. I don’t have to prepare them, they’re there when I need them.”

“Then why not eat carrots, apples, toast, bananas?”

“Toast is good, but it has to be prepared - needs cooking, buttering, leaves crumbs. I like bananas - they come with built in wrappers to keep your fingers clean. Carrots and apples aren’t really food, don’t satisfy, and apples are slimy as well, juice the fingers.”

“So what do you eat?”

“Coffee, cookies, ice cream, candy, pizza.”

“But that’s so bad for you.”

“No, that’s misconception. We’re all the same thing - protons, electrons, quark by-products. All this difference is illusion. Doesn’t make any difference what I eat except convenience.”

“Then you could eat rocks.”

“Yes, if I could get my mind in the right place. Rocks are made of the same stuff we are, they just move slower. Actually I need to get to the place I can absorb what I need from the air. Solve my problems.”


one of the 5 food groups - foto by smith
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comestibles

Sunday, August 24th, 2008

cup of hot chocolate at a cafe - foto by smith

mommy, why is daddy so tough?
shut up and keep chewing.

there, i wrote a cannibal joke to go with my chicken, grape, cop, knock knock, and zen jokes. david letterman here i come.

3 esoteric food poems . . .

~ ~ ~

Harpo Chord

Vocal cow chords unallowed to meat
Is why hamburgers Kant talk

Re Marx Smith

~ ~ ~

Nulvoid 1

You can eat your cake and have it too
You just got to save your shit

~ ~ ~

Oedipus Rx

They got
  beer
  pop
  wine
But never
  mom
for sale


mutant banana - foto by smith
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COAXING HAPPINESS

Monday, September 3rd, 2007

We’re coaxing happiness out of the last bit of French sunshine before we return to the US. The kitchen window looks out over an ancient hill town, old Mediterranean roof tiles - directly across the window, vine hangs on wall, heavy with passion fruit.

The back bedroom window looks over fields of grapevines, and the Pyrenees mountains are purple on the horizon. In the back yard we have several fig trees, and they just happen to be ripe right now. The owner made some fig jam and left some for us to try. She bade us eat as many figs as we like. I roasted some in the oven last night and served them over yogurt.

In the morning Smith walks three minutes to the bakery, and brings back fresh croissants or a baguette.

I have the feeling that it won’t be possible to travel here again - with global warming, we don’t think it’s ethical for us to fly across the Atlantic - and more than once is more than we can afford to do unless we make it as artists or writers. So this month is my good bye to Europe. But I’m excited that we’ll be settling (at least for a while) in Chicago. It’s always been one of my dreams to live there as well. Kind of like a big version of Cleveland. Familiar Midwestern culture plus a lot of diversity, a literary scene and arts scene. The future is a big unknown but I feel positive about it.

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TREACLE AND SPOTTED DICK

Monday, August 6th, 2007

“If you don’t eat yer meat, you can’t have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don’t eat yer meat?” - Another Brick in the Wall Part II, Pink Floyd

“I hear water in the walls,” Smith says.

“You hear the treacle pudding. I’m boiling one behind your head.” He’s right. The boiling does sound like water doing something mischievous.

“Treacle? Doesn’t that mean something disgusting?”

“Close. I think it’s a sugar syrup.”

I’ve decided to try treacle and pudding. Both words I’d associated with the British, not having a real concept of what they were until I happened upon some Heinz pudding cans at the grocery store. I bought two cans: “spotted dick” and “treacle.”

(Incidentally, Heinz was one of the companies to try to institute–along with Grand Daddy Prescott Bush–a corporate coup d’etat of Roosevelt’s government. Heinz and Bush were also fascist Nazi sympathizers.)

I boil the can for 35 minutes, according to instruction. I gingerly move it out of the pan. As I open it, it makes a little “splut” noise. I turn it upside down into a bowl, and open the other side. The pudding collapses down neatly. I garnish it with whipped cream.

The grain of the pudding is like a finely baked moist cake. It’s intensely sweet, and hot. I don’t think I’ve eaten anything this sweet before.

“What do you think of this?”

“It’s nothing I would choose to eat. It’s not bad or anything. Just a little bit too sweet. Plus it’s got a horrible name. Treacle, and spotted dick.”

Smith picks up my plate after I finish.

“Oh, you’re sweet. But not as sweet as treacle.”

“Thank God. I’d get diabetes. Don’t Dick and Jane have a dog named Spot? They could have spotted Dick.”

“See Jane lick Dick.”

“Now, now. Jane speak with spotted tongue.”

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THE ‘OTHER KATHY’

Friday, June 1st, 2007

From Moroccan tannery

I’m vigilant about nutrition. I try to follow the food pyramid, count calories, walk or run daily, etc., and I weigh myself every morning. This is how I’ve maintained my weight loss for two years. It took five years to lose my “other Kathy” and I refuse to get fat again.

I eat a cookie. I look for the box. I want to know the magnitude of caloric damage.

“Where is the box for this?” I ask Smith. “I need the nutritional information.”

“I folded it up and put it in the trash.” He pops a cookie into his mouth. Sees the last one, tries to give it to me. “Here, you eat the last cookie. That way it’ll be fair.”

“Don’t ask me that. I don’t want another cookie. I don’t even like these. You eat that. You’re bigger than I am. You don’t want me to get FAT, and I don’t want to BE fat again.”

“Oh, if you get fat, I’ll put you in a cage.”

“You couldn’t have FIT me in a cage.”

“It’ll be tight. Your flesh might ooze out around the bars. That’s what I do. I put fat people in cages. That’s how Mom lost weight. She got tired of her cage. I kept making the cage smaller, increased her desire to get thinner. I don’t even have to use bars. I just use society as my cage. Plus I make the fat people suffer. I put wheels on the cages. Then I drive real slow past the french fry windows.”

“Oooo… french fries.” Fresh McDonalds fries sound really good to me right now.

“I also toss them plastic potato chips.”

“I want a half pan of Pizza Hut Pizza, that’s what I’m craving.”

“You gonna buy products from the corporate evil-doers? I thought you had principles. I guess I better order your cage. Let’s go…”

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