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...and they lived happily ever after. Smith & Lady: poets, artists, photographers & adventurers.
Our relationship was forged to the soundtrack of Yoko Ono's magic,
frenetic, love-laden song, "Walking On Thin Ice." ( play song )

do i want cheese with my whine?

thru my windshield while driving – foto by Smith

Not as many fotos up here for me, yet more for Lady (who has taken some nice ones). Here’s my shots from yesterday.

our car / parking lot / new bought glass – foto by Smith

fence outside our Love Shack Out Back – foto by Smith

Bluebeard as leprechaun on front of Ford – foto by Smith

Computer, WiFi and reality are playing head games with me, and right now I’m losing. But that’s temporary because they can play all the games they want and I’ll still be coming out on top because I ALWAYS bounce back, I ALWAYS come out on top (at least in my mind, and what else really matters except what Lady thinks)..

I’m in a bit of a down spiral, for multiple reasons.

1) This cold sunless wet weather hurts my heat acclimated body. Winter 2006 we were in the Istrain tip of Croatia on the warm Adriatic Sea for the first part and in the south of France near the warm Mediterranean Sea for the second half. Winters 2007 and 2008 we spent in the 77-88 degree warmth of southern Mexico. I’m used to soporific soaking in heat not painful sucking out cold. I have to get tough again to live in Cleveland.

2) Except for food poisoning in Spain, repeated food poisoning in Morocco, food poisoning in Mexico, and a damn nasty cold caught in Paris, I almost never get sick. Yet that’s the first thing that happens when we finally return to the U.S. – we catch some weird flu-like cold-like thing that our Chicago friend calls “the plague”.

3) The U.S. eats money, feeds on speed and stress. Most here don’t listen to what you say because they’re already typing out their responses inside their head.

4) I’ve never seen so many unhappy faces, beaten faces, afraid faces as I have here.

5) Driving a car is stressful, dangerous, expensive, bad for the planet and bad for the pocketbook. Our last three years walking, riding public transport and bicycles was a peaceful fairly stress free gift – except of course when we carried too much weight on our backs in our backpacks, had to walk too far to the next node, got lost or confused, missed departure and arrival deadlines, etc.

6) We’ve an empty third floor apartment up windy narrow twisty stairs to fill with unfound furniture with no pickup or truck to do so

DISCLAIMER: Once the sun returns and the earth warms and my sickness leaves my body, I’ll be a lot more cheerful and upbeat. The good news here is I have Lady. Of course the bad news here is I have Lady because without her, none of this would matter because I’d not give a shit. Lady’s love condemns me to life and life condemns me to mental and moral pain. Not that I was all that happy before Lady, but before her I was at least used to my unhappiness. She ruined me for my old me when showed me happy.

Reality is a state of mind, and mine is weakened by grey wet cold sunless sickness right now – all of which are temporary. But still, knowing is not always believing.

Anyway, blogging’s getting iffier until I switch to the new laptop I just bought.

4 Responses to “do i want cheese with my whine?”

  1. Jack McGuane says:

    I once found where happy is. I can’t tell you how to find but I know it’s possible. Only two things I ever learned, somethings gonna change and happiness is possible. Keep looking.

  2. MadM says:

    New laptop sounds good; you can heat yer lap with it till the sun returneth.

  3. MadM says:

    O yes, agreed on the beaten, unhappy, afraid faces, the speed, the stress (All fed by A Greed).
    But: you need not join ’em. I’m about to remove myself from their number, and knowing that has me feeling lighter. (That, and the fact that I recovered from The Plague as well)>

  4. jb says:

    i have the wagon
    if furniture found

    yes U.S. = stress

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