 The New Church of Einstein – foto by smith I’m starting The New Church of Einstein. Einstein said the Universe & Everything was all relative–speed changes time, time changes space, space changes mass, and we’re all mixtures of all the above so each of our individual axis are relative. We be related relationships, relatively. And since time is money, my new church will relate us all via time and money, honey. We’re all brothers and sisters in the Temple of E=mc2, so I need each of you to contribute one daily dollar to my churchly collar or I holler out your sins. For the Germans, ein stein = 1 glass of beer, so that’ll be your holy communion blood, making your secret sacrament time and beer. As for me, the holy ritual remains marijuana because it massages time and space and place and pace and at base makes even relatives pleasantly manageable. Of course I’m going on a sacramental sabbatical moving to Cleveland where the lack of churchly funds means no cannabis contortions, so I’ll be walking among my fledging flock as a mere unstoned mortal–which will be good because I can better understand their normals need for the holy high. Remember, Jesus said “Let those among you without a high take the first stone toke.”  bro brain – foto by smith |