They’d go out once a week, party,
drink, dance…
I found a joke book in their drawers
once about the different shapes of
tits
All different tit shapes
And my dad flew a plane
their friends had motorcycles
In fact, my father’s father
made a couple fortunes
in Mexican gold mines
but lost them all
Seems to me a lot of people
in my family
were marginal,
law-wise
My mother’s brother
actually raped
a 12-year old farmer’s daughter
and I know he beat his wife–
He broke into a jail
with a sawed-off shotgun
to break his friend out,
and they both stayed–
My Uncle Juanie
drank a quart of whiskey a day
I know that my cousin Juanita
stayed at our place on the farm
a couple nights
somebody was looking for her,
probably the authorities–
Some of my parents’ friends
(I thought this was really cool)
started to build their house
but ran out of money
so they had the basement,
the floor of the house,
and the frame around the house
and that was it
so
we went down in the basement–
where they lived–
to visit
As a child I thought that was
pretty cool
**
I don’t know very much
about my family
never cared to, actually
all those relatives
were just more strangers
to put up with
(but on a regular basis)
My father had
seven or eight brothers & sisters
We’re the kinda family
always getting together for holidays
30, 40 people
always visiting
Some of them smelled
really stale and old
My father was one of the most
honest and honorable
of the bunch
Some of the sisters
married richer folk
and put on airs…
I can’t think of a single
relative I really liked
outside of Mom, my Dad
and my brother–
blood relative
Couple of the surviving
ones probably wonder
what happened to Mom–
Never cared about my past
because I’ve never
defined myself in terms
of my bloodline or heritage–
I also cut that bloodline off
by having myself sterilized
so whatever my bloodline has
to accomplish…
rests with me…
I like it that way.
**
When Mom died,
she was the last one
who could give me answers
about anything
So even if I wanted to know,
I couldn’t.
I don’t even ask my friends
questions.
I do ask the occasional stranger
what they do to survive…
Gonna put all their answers
in a book and sell it back to ’em…
**
It’s weird that I’m leaving
town with the funky voice again-
a weird gestalt-
About moving to Europe-
Kathy said it-
and I said, Why not?
Kathy had the vector,
I had the inclination
Should be a market for us
in this content-starved world.
We can become content.
We’re not following anybody’s footsteps
We don’t have any handbooks telling us
how to do this…
We fall to float…
(It doesn’t work
if you worry about
the safety net
)
**
We have no idea
what we are doing
We are the Heisenberg
Uncertainty Principle
couple
We’ve done the vector and
Whacko!
we’re hurtling that way…