WALKING ON THIN ICE

Cleveland closed – foto by son Smith

1) I may disappear shortly, blog-wise (I know, you were hoping I’d disappear corporeally as well). My less-than two-year old two-hour battery now holds only 14 minutes of charge when fully charged, and every time I reboot, the computer tells me I have to buy a new one. This is the second Dell laptop battery to die in the past 3 years. What kind of company sells you a one year battery for a $1,000 computer? I’d answer that, but my profanity might get out of hand. Dell computers suck big time. I will never buy another Dell product of any kind. My wife’s Dell laptop batteries died twice too, so she trashed it and bought a Compact.

2) The Dell laptop batteries also overheat and burn your lap.

3) The power cord connection is bad as well, keeps losing contact and reverting to battery power – and if I don’t notice it, 8 minutes later the computer light starts flashing red and the machine turns itself off. I know it’s the Dell computer port that’s defective because I just bought a brand new power cord – my 4th Dell power cord in 3 years.

You can see why I’ve such a lousy opinion of Dell computers.

4) And finally, our mysterious magic internet WiFi connection has disappeared as well. Don’t know where the signal came from or where it went. We found the connection floating through the air when we first stayed in Chiplis’s little 2-room love shack out back in 2006 after we sold our studio. It was still here when we visited the states in 2007 and 2008 and for our first 11 days back this time. So we’ll have to find a library or coffee house to connect.

This doesn’t bother me too much because things are getting complicated and harder to write about, but Lady needs the net to do some web work she’s being paid for. We have to find our own place, get our own connection, live our new life in this strange, colorless, cold land.

the story’s never ending – foto by son Smith

Smith collage for Dick Head’s Clevebland Rag-o-zeen, 1985 back cover – foto by Smith

Over at musician/collector friend’s place, he brought out some 1984-85 issues of Clevebland Rag-o-zeen put out by Robert Ritchie a.k.a. Dick Head, a punk musician artist poet publisher performance artist and professional self abuser who’s amazingly enough still alive. There were two front and one back covers by me.

Odd how the past loops around 24 years later.

I didn’t think so at first, but our moving back was a good idea. The cold and faster life of shock and all invigorate.

Something’s going to happen. Something’s already happening.

Smith collage for Dick Head’s Clevebland Rag-o-zeen, 1985 front cover – foto by Smith

Smith collage for Val Seeley poetry book by Dick Head – foto by Smith

through a glass darkly – foto by smith

My blog readership has dropped 50% since we returned to America. Apparently it’s not what I say but where I say it that interests folks, the surface and not the content.

Last year a literary agent replied to our request for representation by saying if I’d reduce my memoir Criminal to a non-fiction book proposal, she’d take a look at it. I did, sent it to her, and never heard from her again – not even a no thank you. So our one nibble slipped the hook. If only one of them would read the book I feel we’d be fine – there’s no other true story even remotely like it.

There is an artist in Hollywood we met in Krakow who wants to turn my life story into a movie, but he has no financing so we’re trying to come up with a script to shop around. We met him when he was the leader of the Urban-Jellen Test avant-garde cabaret garage rock n roll band in Poland in 2006. His movie name is John Mann, while his rock name is Blue7. He had us read our poetry as part of his opening acts for four different concerts. Repeatedly reciting poetry from memory before a rock audience is a definite thrill.

Right now Blue7’s working in the art department on Iron Man 2. He’s also worked over the years as an art director / storyboard artist / creature and visual effects design / animation director on such films as Superman Returns, The Missing, Cliffhanger, Stuart Little, Long Kiss Goodnight, Mimic, The Fast and the Furious, Mars Attacks, Godzilla, We Were Soldiers, Plant Doctor, Species, Outbreak, Bedazzled, The Girl With a Tail (which he also directed), XXX, Star Gate, Random Hearts, Night At the Museum II, The Getaway, Message In A Bottle, Men In Black II, Star Trek IX, Insurrection, The Specialist, and Clockstoppers. Oddly enough, I’d seen all but 7 of these 26 films. Check him out at imdb.com/name/nm0542820/, or just type in John Mann at IMDB.com and click on the first link.

If you want to watch The Girl With A Tail (13 minutes) click here spike.com/video/girl-with-tail/1144102. WARNING – the film is adults only and a wee bit macabre. Blue7 is also a visual artist, and his art is viewable at blue7.cc/.

Blue7 left America right after 9/11 to live in the mountains of Thailand for a couple years while he painted. Then he took off for a couple more years to form and lead a rock band in Krakow, and now he’s back in Hollywood working movies. He and his gorgeous wife Magda visited us in Morocco.

As for the rest of my literally dozens of literary agent inquiry letters I sent out, 25% bothered to say no, while the rest just ignored me.

I’m an unknown writer trying to get my odd anti-social story told in a hostile time via overwhelmed literary agents while the publishing industry is tanking along with the rest of the world economy. Bad timing.

But I will prevail.

As for being back, it’s starting to wear at me. The cold aggravates my torn groin muscle (an injury which will not heal that I incurred trying to pick my soon to be dead overweight mother up off the floor in 2004), and all the money going out to reestablish life in America is deeply discouraging. But as Lady pointed out, life here is also stimulating. Tomorrow night is the coolest monthly open mic poetry venue around at The Literary Cafe; the next night is the monthly Tremont Art Walk (and Tremont is the coolest, edgiest art neighborhood in Cleveland); the day after that is the monthly open poetry mic at the Brandt Gallery; and the following Tuesday is the monthly reading Lix & Kix at 806 (where Lady and I will be the featured poets in May). This is the stuff we returned for, food for the mind, heart and soul.

And it’s almost spring, so heat, green, flowers, trees, and butterflies are just a calendar page away. And the money flow will slow once we’ve found a place to live and stocked it. Then I can start making art again, which will soothe my inner angst, and I can return to sending out paper pleas to more literary agents. Even if nothing happens, I’ll still be doing, and doing is the key to inner ease.

It’s odd right now though because I have to talk myself into each day. And I can’t get too down because I’ve a lovely Lady who has enough on her plate and doesn’t need any extra worries from me.

And I did a good thing yesterday – I had a wee bit of weed left over from my birthday and I decided not to smoke and stuck to it. Let’s hear it for logic, discipline and will power. It’s even better because one of my longest friends is stopping by today and now I’ve a wee bit left to share with him.

Life: Constant Compromise.

25th Street, Cleveland – foto by smith